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>The Humane Society of the Western Collegiate Hockey Association

14 November 2005

>We here at the Runnin’ With the ‘Dogs world headquarters have had, since, well, forever, an unofficial feature that we shall now refer to, forever and always, as the Humane Society of the WCHA. It is a place for those Bulldogs who have done something to anger The Powers That Be Runnin’ This Website. Once in the HSWCHA, these ‘Dogs are still treated well, fed, walked, petted, and so on. However, a Bulldog can only stay in the HSWCHA for so long, and there are only two ways out. 1. Making a positive contribution to the team, or 2. Euthanasia. I understand that the latter option opens up a moral can of worms, but the staff here does everything it can to prevent exercize of the policy.

There are some rules about this Humane Society, or at least some largely accepted truths. First of all, there are certain players that have immunity from the HSWCHA. These players are special favorites of RWD, coach’s pets, if you will: Matt Niskanen, Matt McKnight, Mike Curry, and Michael Gergen hold Get Out Of the Humane Society Free cards. Then there are players that have their own special kennels there, because they are perpetually (or nearly perpetually) in Hot Water with us. Steve Czech is on that short list. Referees are not even discussed here because there is really no point in harping, week after week, about the referees and how much they suck.

Now, let’s talk about who’s been left on the doorstep in a basket after this weekend:

Isaac Reichmuth: That 7th goal made me want to sprout wings and swoop down from the stands and throttle him. My travelling companion wanted to yank him after the 6th goal, but he is not a coach, and I am not a goaltending coach, and in the goal he remained, and let the puck trickle ever so slowly into the net. I mean, seriously, I could have taken the time to go to the locker room, suit up, skate onto the ice, do a little dance, and then flop into the crease and STILL stop the puck from going in. It is things like this that will give me a heart attack by the time I’m 25.

Jeff McFarland: It is my firm belief that if you are not going to contribute to the team in any sort of a positive manner, you should not be hindering the team anyway. Like if you are a center and you have three assists and that matches a CAREER HIGH then you should not be in the penalty box, virtually erasing a 5 min major power play for the ‘Dogs.

Not too many people in trouble after the weekend. Now we have to start awarding the glory. Raise your glasses, ladies and gentlemen, to:

Nick Kemp, for grinding it out the whole game, and delivering some bang-on checks that were completely legal, so that Anderson could not possibly call a penalty. Shortly after I requested someone put Mike Prpich, the Spearing King, in his place, Nick levelled him directly in front of the Sioux bench. I have never been prouder of Nick, even if he didn’t have any points that night.

Mason Raymond, who is going to be a thorn in North Dakota’s side for the next four years.

Adam Davis, for stepping up his defensive play. I didn’t expect much from him but I was pleasantly surprised this weekend. For someone who doesn’t play very many games, he had a lot of poise and made some good passes. He’s not the best d-man (hello, we all know it’s Matty N.), but he is improving rapidly.

Justin May, for being an absolute stud of a strength and conditioning coach. I didn’t see very many tired legs out there.

The Bulldog freshmen, for having the work ethic, the hustle, and the talent to play their hearts out every minute of the weekend, and for having that energy and spirit infuse the rest of the team. Thank you, thank you, from everyone who remembers the ‘Dogs from last year.

And finally, Tim Stapleton, who was the only Bulldog last year who seemed to give a crap towards the end of the season, and who is leading the team by example. I know you play your heart out, too, Tim, thanks for giving the new boys someone to look up to. In my eyes, you’re the captain.


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