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7 December 2008


tUMD 7, Overrated Kittens 4
tUMD 45, California University That Is Not In California, 7
tUMD 4, Stupid Beavers 1

(Okay, I’ve been awake for 20 hours, please forgive the incoherence. But I couldn’t go to sleep without finishing this post.)

Amazing day in Bulldog sports. tUMD’s football team put on a clinic for running backs, tUMD’s women’s hockey beat Bermidji for the googolth time, and then my wonderful boys showed CC what happens when you’re cursed with the #1 ranking pre-season.

This epic battle was fought between two teams that are stronger on Saturdays than Fridays. CC, in fact, was undefeated prior to this evening. Like I told Pates during his live blog (which is super fun! Everyone should joint the party! Except it’s less fun when he doesn’t accept my witty comments!), there’s a first time for everything.

I need some guidance here, some help coloring inside the lines, because of my exhausted delirium, so let’s go through the game chronologically.

Originally, I thought the game was going better than last night’s game. We made it through a minute of play without giving up a goal! That’s always good. I mean, we still gave up a scoring chance but it didn’t cross the goal line, so that’s improvement. However, for most of the 3rd period, CC had tDogs on their heels. And then a homeless person off the street who was inserted into the lineup decided to score a goal. I still thought, okay, fine, no biggie, that’s how we started off last time, down 1-0, still tied, it’s not the end of the world. We killed off a penalty and then killed off a portion another before heading to the locker room (well, I didn’t–I wish!) only down 1-0, which was kind of fortunate. It was kind of an uggo period.

Then the 2nd period started, and tDogs remained on the PK, and Chad Rau, helped by the Traitor and Daddy’s Boy, had one of those just-after-the-power-play goals that sucks to give up but at least it doesn’t hurt the PK stats! That one was kind of tough. I thought maybe CC was going to get out of their little funk and take off. Well, the joke was on me, because 19 seconds later, Justin to Jacky to Jordy and *boom* 2-1. A minute and 26 seconds later, some jerk took a penalty and Justin Fontaine, always the darling, thought “Poor MeanEgirl. She’s been having a really tough time lately. How can I help her out?” and then the puck was in the net again. Monty and Palm assisted. Thanks guys!

The homeless person scored again, assisted by Imitation Connelly and Chad Rau to make it 3-2, and at this point I realized this game was going to be high-scoring. I knew tDogs weren’t out of it but I also believed the Tigers would not go quietly into that good night. Mike “I Might Be Sexy But I’m Uggo Because I Think Kneeing Is Ok” Testwuide took a penalty for, well, duh, and then Ryan Lowery, Public Enemy Number One, flattened poor MacGregor Sharp into the boards and received some lovely parting gifts as he was asked to leave the arena. During the ensuing 5 on 3, Evan “Stop Calling Me Ryan You Illiterate CC Announcer” Oberg scored on assists from Meyers and Fuzzy. Back to even. Sharpy was on the ice for that as well, so he was all right despite getting clobbered by He Who Is About To Die, and then that sneaky Sharpshooter decided he was going to show Richard Bachman who was the man and who was the very little boy, and shot a laser-guided missile into the roof of the net, his sleight of hand fooling all but that wily goal judge, who saw it all the way and lit that lamp like a beacon of hope unto us all. And we had our first lead of the weekend, and our first lead on CC since (pause for me to look it up) we crapped away a 2-0 game in the 3rd period in January 2007.

But they weren’t done! Nick Kemp was all “I’m sick of being On Notice!” and I said “I think so, Nick!” and despite CC’s attempts to hook Sharpy, he got it to Nick and Nick took it to the house. 5 goals in a period. God. Remember when we couldn’t get 5 goals in a weekend? Remember when the 2nd period was a black hole of horrendous defence? Those days are over now!

CC then went back to their locker room and cried like Dude Love when he found out crazytechfan was 16.

I guess Bachman was inconsolable, because to start the 3rd period, Drew O’Connell was in net. I don’t really like him, mostly because his name is just one letter away from this guy who was really horrible to me back when I was in ROTC. Screw him. Drew also gave us our most recent win against CC, also in January 2007, in a game where Josh Meyers got a powerplay goal simply by gaining the red line and dumping the puck in the offensive zone. Jeff McFarland scored the GWG in that game, too, if you can believe it. So, this is a really long way of saying Drew O’Connell is a great big sieve, doo-dah, doo-dah. Jordy Fulton agreed, because he scored about 4 minutes into the period to make it 6-3. Arthur Fonzarelli had the only assist, but I’m sure Jacky was just as helpful in setting up the play. Some dumb loser from CC must have gotten a stick on the puck for a second or two there. Sharpshooter had a penalty and Al took a stab at a goal on a clearing attempt, but it was way wide. Tragic. Daddy’s Boy scored on that power play, assisted by the homeless person and the Traitor. It was their only ppg of the weekend, so I guess they can get a nice little gold star. Kyle Schmidt got in on the scoring as well, getting his 2nd goal of the year and effectively putting the last nail in the coffin for those tigers. I know they are endangered species so I certainly hope Kyle doesn’t get in trouble for poaching. I doubt it, he is one smooth criminal.

I’m tired. There will be more tomorrow. This thing took me forever to write because I’m effectively a zombie. Thanks for the great game, guys! Have a safe trip home! I know you’re going to be dragging your tired butts out of bed in about 2 1/2 hours. Yikes.

The Numbers
Wins until we equal last season’s total: 5! (WOW!!!!!!!!!!!)
Points until we equal last season’s total: 11! (GLORIOUS!!!!!!!!!!!!)

My Guys
MacGregor Sharp: 18!
Jack Connolly: 12!
Michael Gergen: 7
Rob Bordson: 0

Mike Connolly: 13!
Jack Connolly: 12!
David Grun: 0
Scott Kishel: 0
Brady Lamb: 0
Travis Oleksuk: 0

On Notice:
Rob Bordson
Andrew Carroll
Jay Cascalenda
Matt Greer
Alex Stalock

Goals Only
Drew Akins
Jack Connolly
Cody Danberg
Mike Montgomery
Trent Palm

3 Comments leave one →
  1. 7 December 2008 4:30 pm

    >Everyone should joint the partyIs it that kind of party??

  2. 7 December 2008 4:41 pm

    >UMD football won again. Good for them, I believe the NSIC is being done proud.

  3. 8 December 2008 8:35 pm

    >Couldn’t believe the folks on the cc-tUMD scores update didn’t comment on”Stop Calling Me Ryan You Illiterate CC Announcer”. Perhaps I was wrong, I even checked the tUMD roster to see if EVAN had a younger brother. But N-O-O-O, just plain incompetence on the part of “Stop Calling Me Ryan You Illiterate CC Announcer”.MacGregor Sharp–love the name! AND he scored right after I mentioned it. Do you think he heard me? I may have to review tUMD roster pictures.


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