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>Switching Lanes

4 September 2009


Oh my god, y’all.

When we talk about football, we have to be all Southern, doncha know?

Anyway, here’s what we have to talk about. Tonight’s football game. Which was on TV! Glorious!

Kind of.

Come on, guys. Only one UMD sport is supposed to enrage me. You football boys are just supposed to win games. I didn’t know you even know how to lose! Ok, I know that we had a true freshman at quarterback and we really have no passing game (except for the one exciting big one that I thought for sure was going to, like, the piccolo player), but even the referee couldn’t get the team’s name right (“Time out, Cal Washington!”) and they were sightseeing at Mount Rushmore two days ago! Speaking of Mount Rushmore, did you know it hides a lost city made entirely out of gold? I learned that yesterday from Nicolas Cage. Anyway, a bunch of pansies who were out romancing bison mere days ago should have been no match for Isaac Odim!

I was happy to see UMD football on my TV, though, and they certainly tried hard and weathered many many many attempts (some successful) by Central Washington to injure our players (including #9 who learned his blocking moves from the Vikings’ #4). And the announcers totally called us “Minnesota” a few times… take that you stinkin’ Gophers!

Edit: Overheard by Mullet at the football game: “Is Central Washington in Minnesota?” Jolly good.

One Comment leave one →
  1. 4 September 2009 5:43 pm

    >Unforunately, the Dogs lost on the last play of the game by a field goal. The last team to beat the dogs was the Sioux before CW.


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