Skip to content

>Dear Drew, Vol. 2

26 January 2010

>

It is a somewhat common misconception that Minnesotans are tough because of the winters, or our occupations as farmers or miners or some other rugged job, or because we are the sons and daughters of the rapers and pillagers from Valhalla.

No way. It’s because of our sports teams. What a brutal weekend. That Vikings game was probably one of the most agonizing I have ever seen, because we all knew it was over but IT JUST WOULD NOT DIE. I am pretty sure that the next installment of the Saw franchise will incorporate elements of the game into its script.

But, as D.H. Lawrence says, “we have to live, no matter how many skies have fallen.” And what better way than with the next installment of Dear Drew?

———————————————————————————

Dear Drew,

I have a reputation as an angry person with a bad temper. I think it’s pretty unjustified. Sometimes a coach just needs to hit a player with a chair. Is that so wrong?

Sincerely,
Robin Red Vest

Dear RRV,

Please stay on your side of the ice this weekend.

-Drew

———————————————————————————

Dear Drew,

I’m not having a very good season. Not because of my stats or anything, but because my coach would literally rather play no one in net than me. Even if the other goalie on my team gives up 8 goals in a weekend. I mean, what’s so special about him? What do I have to do? Wear a giant afro wig? I WANT ATTENTION TOO!!

Frantically,
Patty

Dear Patty,

Uh, don’t shoot the messenger, but my magic 8-ball says Outlook Not So Good.

-Drew

———————————————————————————

Dear Drew,

I have a very stupid nickname and I must have been high when I decided to use it as my official moniker. How can I overcome this?

Nominally,
Josh T.

Dear Podge,

Dream on, sucka!

-Drew

Thanks again, Drew! I know you’re a busy guy, two blogs in a week!

Advertisements
One Comment leave one →
  1. 29 January 2010 2:52 am

    >His advice column is so much better than the blog on tUMD's site.

Well?

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: