>A Burden In My Hand and An Anchor On My Heart
>
I’ve made no secret about how much I dislike tUMD being #1 in the polls. I know it doesn’t matter, it doesn’t mean anything, it’s just, like, someone’s opinion, man. But it’s just a ginormous target and an extremely weighty expectation.
Last time tUMD was ranked #1 in the polls was my first season writing RWD. The subsequent disastrous weekend contest against Vermont, which resulted in a loss and a tie, precipitated the complete abomination of a season. And I’m being polite there.
Now, would they have had the same terrible season without that #1 ranking? Uh, yeah. There were a lot of problems with that team. And yes, I know, these aren’t the same guys. Most of them don’t even know the guys on that team. Except for Justin Faulk, who is Marco Peluso’s cousin. Oh Marco, what could have been. (Okay, upon further inspection, maybe there was more overlap than I thought.) But until this weekend is over I’m just going to sit here and freak out about that #1 ranking.
I prefer my teams to fly under the radar. Then they get overlooked, and pounce while their opponents are caught napping. Other teams champ at the bit to knock off #1 teams. Last weekend, #1 BU played Merrimack, a useless school I find interchangeable with Mercyhurst. If not for the Chris Connolly Come From Behind Special, BU would have made out with one sad little point. Instead they got two sad little points. Wisconsin is almost, but not quite as pathetic as Merrimack, and I’m nervous we’ll come out of there with a big fat zippity-zero.
So the #1 ranking is great for recruiting, as DHG and Ciskie said, and it’s nice to see their hard work and great success get rewarded. I don’t want this ranking to end up the albatross around their necks. Let’s hope these young gentlemen don’t take their focus off the REAL issue: WINNING.
>The Gauntlet: Dead Deer Loving Edition
>
RWD: So, I noticed your team was swept at home by UND this past weekend. How did that occur?
CS: Coming out guns blazing eh? A veteran team played much better than our inexperienced team. They also cheated a lot.
RWD: That’s rough. How frustrating. It really makes you want to check an empty net, doesn’t it?
CS: I’m actually shocked this wasn’t the first thing out of your mouth. [Or off of my fingers, since this is the Internet.] At least he didn’t get a running start from the red line like Hirsch…and then go lay his stick at center ice.
RWD: Well, he didn’t want Eaves to beat him.
CS: Wow.
RWD: I went there!
CS: That was settled out of court.
RWD: I’m sure it was.
CS: Actually, I have no idea, but it sounded good.
RWD: I hope on Judge Judy.
CS: Shes hot. [Horrifying.] I wonder if she played for the Lady Bulldogs? [Chuck is a sexist pig who thinks that it’s okay for men’s teams to be called by the school nickname while women’s teams have to have the word “Lady” qualifying them.]
RWD: Never heard of them. But has moving to St. Cloud tainted your taste in women or something?
CS: Clearly you haven’t seen the girls I roll with. My view has always been tainted.
RWD: Or perhaps their views are the only ones that haven’t been tainted. [If there are any actual girls with which he rolls.]
CS: Call it what you want to call it.
RWD: So, who has retired more? You or Brett Favre? [Chuck retires from blogging every time someone “steals” a story from him. He’s like a little kid who says they’re running away from home.]
CS: Probably me, but he’s sent out more pictures of his little gun slinger than I have. For those keeping track at home, that’s zero for me.
RWD: The whole world thanks you. [Yikes.]
CS: You have no idea…
RWD: I… don’t even want to know. [I stared at the sun in an attempt to blind myself.] So, speaking of tragedies. What happened against BC?
CS: Arguably the worst day of my life, second to only learning that Four Loko is coming off the shelves.
RWD: Ugh, that was all that flirting between you and Joe [of Pro Hockey Talk] last night [on Twitter].
CS: Flirting? I call it helping a brother out. As for the game, I blame it on me actually attending, I didn’t go in 2006 and they finished the job. Detroit sucks by the way.
RWD: Wow, what other surprising facts can you tell me? I did not know this! Parking Wars Detroit is amazing, btw.
CS: Duluth has never won an NCAA title. [Interesting non sequitur.]
RWD: I find this acceptable. Then I can see the first one. They were one [poopy] bounce away from one.
CS: You sound like a Sioux fan with your excuses.
RWD: I stated one fact! [And I didn’t blame the refs!]
CS: I’d blame it on the bad air they suck in at the DECC on the reg. [What?] That place sucked.
RWD: Ah, we can’t all play in basketball arenas where senile old men hold up stupid signs.
CS: As opposed to DHG running around the rink after goals?
RWD: He doesn’t do that anymore. Biddco does. Sometimes a blowup doll does. [Kelly Clarkson!]
CS: I remember going to a game at the DECC when I was a kid and being like, who is this old guy running around the building?
RWD: Kids. Thinking everyone’s old. [Really. I mean, DHG wasn’t that old. He is now.]
CS: And by kid I mean like… 15.
RWD: When are they going to pull Phil’s plug anyway?
CS: Bah…Phil’s the man. Can’t fault the old guy for getting the fans going. He’s a legend.
RWD: He’s a senile nincompoop. So were you a Crease Creature? [That’s those raving lunatics in the student section who know nothing about hockey.]
CS: I’ve been an unofficial Crease Creature. Never went to school in Madison. I chose the Harvard of the west. [Whatever that is.]
RWD: Well, tUMD is the Harvard of the MIDwest.
CS: I almost went to [t]UMD. But then I visited and saw the girls there.
RWD: Intimidated by all the hotties? I can see that.
CS: Yep, way out of my league.
RWD: So why are there so many bloggers on your site? Or, the site on which you blog. [He doesn’t have admin privileges!]
CS: Most of us are lazy, so when one of us feels like taking some time off, someone else is supposed to step up. Key word there is “supposed.” It’s also so that we can put bloggers like you to shame.
RWD: How could a good, CREATIVE blogger like me be shamed?
CS: Creative? Did you even make your own banner on your site?
RWD: Yes.
CS: Well that burn fell through. [Hahahahahaha!]
RWD: Who did you think made it?
CS: Someone with some talent, like a male. [See! Oink oink oink!]
RWD: Funny how I’ve outlasted many a male blogger.
CS: Why don’t you blog about the lady Bulldogs?
RWD: There aren’t any lady Bulldogs. Where did you steal “Sixty Minutes, No Alibis, No Regrets” from? A Mike Eruzione motivational speech?
CS: Chris Stafne recommended it to us.
RWD: He has no alibis, but probably regrets.
CS: I would hope.
RWD: So, who’s your favorite opponent’s beat writer?
CS: Brad Elliott Schlossman, only because he has 3 names. And because he loves “Entourage” and “To Catch a Predator.”
RWD: I have three names, too. Don’t you?
CS: Only when my mom is pissed.
RWD: Well, move out of her basement.
CS: Fortunately, or unfortunately depending on how you look at it. I now live almost 3 hours from her basement. Thank God…
RWD: How tragic. I thought you might have said Roman [Augustovitz, of the Star Tribune] was your favorite.
CS: I thought the question was favorite, not most incompetent.
RWD: Hey, he’s always right on top of stories.
CS: …that he reads on other peoples sites.
RWD: Only 6 hours or so after they’re on Twitter, he’s fresh!
CS: I love his tweets at like 2-3 AM. Just marathon tweeting sessions, like anyone is actually reading them (besides me). [He always tweets in the third person, referring to himself as “Eye.” Or maybe he can’t spell “I.”]
RWD: Let’s play a word association game. Or, rather, I will give you two words and you pick which one you prefer. Don’t think about it, just react.
CS: Oh boy. [I know! Games are fun!]
RWD: Elliott or Bruckler?
CS: Elliott. [He probably barely even knows who Bernd Bruckler is.]
RWD: Baggott or Milewski?
CS: pffff
RWD: Not a choice.
CS: Milewski.
RWD: Lenin or Trotsky?
CS: Lenin
RWD: COMMUNIST!
CS: I don’t even know who they are, beattles guy? [Dear god, the spelling.] Who the hell is Trotsky?
RWD: *facepalm*
CS: My Russian history is rusty.
RWD: Let me google that for you.
CS: Appreciate the effort.
RWD: So who do you consider to be Wisconsin’s primary rivals, other than UMTC?
CS: I’d say 1) UMTC [I said other than UMTC] 2) UND 3) Denver/UMD/St. Cloud. Everyone else can suck it
RWD: You consider tUMD a rival?
CS: With the proximity, yeah. But only when they don’t suck… which is few and far between I guess. [Grammar!] So we’re rivals every five years or so. [Chuck is so depressed that I don’t rise to the bait.]
RWD: What about Michigan or the Fartans [Michigan State]?
CS: Muck Fichigan.
RWD: So I take that as a yes.
CS: Yeah, I’m not smart enough to think about things like that. They are probably ahead of Denver/UMD/Cloud. Ann Arbor is still a [woman of low morals].
RWD: Yes, I know, I went to Illinois.
CS: Gasp.
RWD: Are you excited for the B10HC? And Penn State’s immediate and total domination of everyone?
CS: No comment.
RWD: They should probably just go pro.
CS: Honestly, if there is a Bi6 10 conference, and there will be. Penn State will be an elite program in 10 years. [No.]
RWD: Before or after tOSU?
CS: OSU’s stick will go way up with the creation of the Bi6 10 conference. [No.]
CS: stock*
RWD: Works either way. [Hee!]
CS: Zing!
RWD: Who are some of your favorite Badgers on this current team?
CS: Patrick Johnson.
RWD: I feel like that might be a lie.
CS: How dare you. I’m a fan of Zengerle, his hands are amazing.
RWD: INAPPROPRIATE.
CS: Easy, he doesn’t roll like FHG.
RWD: Oh snap! Although I think you might mean Cardinal.
CS: That too. At least FHG would probably have filled out the pre-season poll. Can’t say the same about Mr. KFAN weekly special.
RWD: So, you said UND is considered a big rival.
CS: I’d like to think so.
RWD: Well, I had a reader-submitted question on that.
CS: You have readers?
RWD: Many! This reader asked why you would start a thread that says “Let’s get hostile and abusive!” and then complain when it got hostile and abusive?
CS: That middle name you were asking about? It’s contradiction. PS… that was extremely lame.
RWD: Well I didn’t make that up, the reader did. An unnamed UND fan.
CS: I have an idea… but I won’t name names. Was he in Boogie Nights?
RWD: Er. Moving along. Who are your favorite All-Time Badgers?
CS: Dany Heatley, but only because he drives Ferraris real fast. And Steven Reinprecht, because I feel bad he got robbed for the Hobey.
RWD: Oh, Reinprick!
CS: Shouldn’t leave out Joe Pavelski. I still feel bad for getting as drunk as I did at his golf outing.
RWD: Save a horse, ride a Cuck Schwartz! [Chuck tweeted that one night this summer and I will not let him live it down. And no, that’s not a typo.]
CS: Pass that on to your friends.
RWD: I… will write it on the bathroom wall at the Sports Garden. [Girls can read it while they are throwing up!] Speaking of bars, where should tUMD fans eat, drink, and fist pump all night long this weekend?
CS: Nitty Gritty is always a hit before the game and the people are usually pretty cool but it will be packed. After the game, if you like Long Islands I suggest this place called Ram Head…it’s in the basement, and it’s shady but the long islands are huge and awesome.
RWD: What’s that one bar all the players go to? For the puck slut in all of us.
CS: KK….Kollege Klub [Kool.]
RWD: So doesn’t Wisconsin have a policy against racist teams?
CS: Yes we do actually…
RWD: Why did they just play UND in basketball then?
CS: Good question.
RWD: AHA! [Hypocrites!]
CS: Guess we were short on cupcakes this year.
RWD: Pronounce this word: “Wquinton.”
CS: W-Quinton? Wuh-quinn-ton.
RWD: So, how about some predictions for what will happen this weekend as the Bulldogs roll into Paint Thinner Nation.
CS: Well, I made my predictions this afternoon on my blog and I feel pretty confident. Like I mentioned, we haven’t lost back to back games in 62 straight contests until last weekend. There is no way we lose 3 in a row. Friday: Wisconsin 5, Duluth 3. [Fail.] Saturday: Duluth 4, Wisconsin 2. [Maybe.]
Oh crap, I forgot to ask him who the hottest Badger was. The answer is Mike Eaves.
>Wireless
>
tUMD 4, Tech 2
Four people asked me when I was going to post. FOUR. Amazing. Anyway, I’m sorry. I did want to post this weekend but the Interwebs at my hotel (The Suites at Waterfront Plaza) had the worst wireless internet connection ever. All I had for internets was my BlackBerry and I can’t really post on here.
Okay, folks, let’s see if Grandma can remember the weekend.
Friday I went to the Coaches’? Coach’s? Which one is it? Show at BWW. I don’t like it there as much as I did at the Sports Garden because it is really hard to hear the show. That’s fine because there was plenty to discuss with my gals. I wanted to win a Bulldog football jersey but this old guy decided to steal it. At first it seemed like a joke but then it became clear that this klepto wasn’t going to let it go. So my friend Kris had to use her feminine wiles to get the jersey back to the table where it belonged. Bruce made me answer a trivia question. You know, it was not that long ago that Bruce was, oh, a bit recalcitrant to allow me on the radio. Now he’s practically begging me for it! He asked me who scored the GWG in the 2009 Final Five championship game. The answer is MacGregor Sharp. I got it right although at the time I was guessing because I was very nervous. Sandy and Justin may were like totally right there watching! So I won a jersey thanks to Schmidt’s mom and my own amazing brain!
The game on Friday started very poorly. tUMD was down 2-0 until just before the end of the 2nd period when Justin Fontaine hooked us up with a goal! Hooray! In the third period, tUMD got a penalty. Fontaine was on the PK and he was taking the puck into the attacking zone and got tangled up with a Tech defender. He shoved the puck toward the net and Tech’s goalie, Robinson, came out to play it. The puck went through his five-hole and into the net. Glorious! MCON and Brett Olson went to the penalty box together and MCON stood there and yelled at him for like 5 minutes before play resume. Then My Jacky got a goal, finally getting himself off the naughty list, Joe Basaraba got his first goal as a Bulldog, Justin Faulk let fly a shot that rang off the pipe, shot up into the air and flew practically all the way to the blue line, and then Dan Delisle got this crazy bouncy goal. The only black mark on that period was the final goal, which came right as tUMD students were chanting “This game’s over.” Oopy. Oh, also, at some point JT Brown did a cannonball right into Tech’s goalie.
Saturday it snowed a lot. I took some pictures. They will be uploaded sometime in 2015. Unless we all die in 2012.
MCON started the scoring off right away in the second game, although Tech answered back quickly. A Tech player got a contact to the head major penalty and was ejected from the game, and tUMD scored early in the 2nd period during that major. Tech scored again, on a play where Kenny tried to dive on the puck and missed and it went under him and into the net. These things occur. A scrum caused tUMD to get a 5 on 3 as Tech’s entire team decided to go after Mike Seidel. He is so badass though and they failed. Justin Faulk got a goal and Eric Kattelus went totally apepoopy and cross-checked Mike, then hit him in the head, then skated toward the bench and had to be dragged away by the referees. It was not his best choice. Then tUMD had another 5 on 3 and Justin Faulk scored another goal. It was the exact same play! Lovely. No one else scored and my little Benny the Elf was kicked out of the game with about a minute left.
MEg and Shirtless guy were part of the on-ice entertainment during intermission. They tried valiantly but could not overcome Champ’s “assistance” to the other team. Walt, the Zamboni Dude, recklessly drove the zam around the ice for his final resurfacing. It was totally awesome. Also, total fail on tUMD’s part for not putting Walt in the middle of their stick salute.
Sorry this post came so late, but another one is coming soon! It’s already half-written. And allegedly a Gauntlet.
Numbers
Wins until we reach last season’s total: 10! (SWEEP!)
Points until we reach last season’s total: 20! (SWEEPITY SWEEP!)
My Guys
Jack Connolly: 18!!! (Offensive player of the week!)
JT Brown: 13!!!
Brady Lamb: 4
Mike Seidel: 3!!!!
Drew Olson: 0
Freshmen
JT Brown: 13!!!
Justin Faulk: 10!!!! (2 PPGS!!!)
Joe Basaraba: 1!!! (First goal as a Bulldog!!!)
others: zeros
Connollys
Mikey: 18!!!
Jacky: 18!!!
Olsen/Olson
Dylan: 10!!!!
Drew: 0
Dan/Drew
Olson: 8
DeLisle: 2
On Notice
David Grun
Jake Hendrickson
Brady Lamb
Max Tardy
Goals Only
Wade Bergman
Keegan Flaherty
Mike Montgomery
Dylan Olsen
Kyle Schmidt (Kyle, you are needed this weekend!)
Mike Seidel
>Move It On Over
>
>Reminder!!!
>
Check it out here.
>Plop, Plop, Fizz, Fizz
>
Oh what a relief it is!
Oh wow. I needed that.
Very impressed with the adjustments tUMD made. Happy to have watched the games on television. Hope someone gives Pat Sweeney the number to a suicide prevention hotline. Laughing my badonkadonk off about the ref whining.
Posting should be back to normal by Wisconsin week. I’ve been on semi-hiatus since Sunday, although I didn’t mention it previously. There should be a Gauntlet for the Tech series as well as for Wisconsin’s.
Numbers
Wins until we reach last season’s total: 12! (Another OT victory!)
Points until we reach last season’s total: 24! (Sweet!)
My Guys
Jack Connolly: 13!
JT Brown: 12!
Brady Lamb: 4
Mike Seidel: 2
Drew Olson: 0
Freshmen
JT Brown: 12!
Justin Faulk: 7!
others: zeros (come on guys, any time now)
Connollys
Mikey: 16!
Jacky: 13!
Olsen/Olson
Dylan: 7!
Drew: 0
Dan/Drew
Olson: 8
DeLisle: 2
On Notice
Dan Delisle
Keegan Flaherty
David Grun
Jake Hendrickson
Brady Lamb
Mike Montgomery
Mike Seidel
Max Tardy
Goals Only
Wade Bergman
Jack Connolly
Dylan Olsen
Kyle Schmidt (Impossible to believe! Kyle! Remedy this at once!)
>Certainty
>
>The Gauntlet: Orca Edition
>
RWD: Are there any particular UMD players that are targeted this weekend? Or should they just all be on alert for an airlift to Minneapolis?
BG: ‘Cause UND is a headhunting team now. Nice. No, since Malone will obviously be brought down by the WCHA Wheel of Justice (c) Joe Yerdon, I think UMD should be fine.
RWD: Ah, so Malone acted alone? [Brandon is under the incorrect assumption that Brad Malone is the only player on UND capable of such infractions.]
BG: What is this, a game of Clue? Malone at the Engelstad with a Warrior Stick?
RWD: I was wondering if the orders came down from on high. Like from Hakstol. Or Virg Foss.
BG: Could have been Goon. [This is true.] He’s a fan of old-time hockey
RWD: Ah, he’s a fan of career- or life-threatening injuries. How is it that UND fans are so passionate about hockey, but don’t bother to learn the rules?
BG: ‘Cause UND fans can’t read. [Or spell.] I thought this was obvious. We’re just a bunch of sugar beet farmers that like blaming the refs for our losses. [And harping on the refs when you win, too!]
RWD: You’re not a sugar beet farmer. You’re a co-pilot.
BG: Shhhhh, don’t tell Happy [some USCHO person]. He’ll be blown away that not all of us are sugar beet farmers.
RWD: Well, it can’t really be hard to be a co-pilot. It’s mostly a figurehead role.
BG: It’s like your job, except it involves more skill.
RWD: It can’t be too skillful to sit there and watch the actual pilot work. Although it must be tempting to touch the shiny buttons.
BG: Yeah, sometimes he lets me sit on his lap and steer. [Whoa! TMI!]
RWD: Do you blog while flying?
BG: Maybe…
RWD: On your Sioux blog or on your Baby Dinosaur blog?
BG: On my third blog.
RWD: Ravings of a Lunatic? [What third blog? Oh, wait, I see, the Baby Dino blog isn’t the same as the sparkly one.]
BG: Sure, whatever.
RWD: So why did you choose to start a blog?
BG: I have that kind of time to write down pointless thoughts? [Not sure why he’s asking me.]
RWD: And why did you choose to name it Inspiration Stardust Dreams? Is it because you are a chick?
BG: That’s not mine, homeslice. [Lies! It lists him as an author!]
RWD: Sure it isn’t. And now you have a workout blog as well? [Okay, that’s the Baby Dino blog. Which… good lord.]
BG: You’d know. [He’s uncooperative.]
RWD: This is read by a vast audience, they may not know!
BG: Yeah, real vast. From sea to shining sea. [He doubts me!]
RWD: I have readers in Connecticut, California, Florida, Texas, Colorado…
BG: So my statement is not [i]naccurate. [It was sarcastic though.]
RWD: I’ll say it’s accurate, rather than use a double negative [and spell the word wrong]. What do you think UND’s new nickname will be?
BG: I’m guessing nothing. It’ll stay as University of North Dakota.
RWD: I heard the killer whales might be a good choice. And you could be their mascot. [Dirty famously said about this picture, “Put a white dot under your arm and you’d be Shamu.”]
BG: I was in the process of swimming 1500 meters. When’s the last time you hopped on a treadmill?
RWD: Generally I run outside. [HAH! And here he thought he was going to get me!]
BG: You run?
RWD: With the ‘Dogs. [Actual running is without them.]
BG: ba dum crash [I… guess that was a rim shot?]
RWD: How long have you been a UND fan?
BG: Since ’99, when I knew that’s where I wanted to go to school.
RWD: I don’t know if the UND staff is a fan of you though. Certainly not Hakstol. And Katie O’Keefe [former intermission hostess-type person] was not a fan.
BG: Maybe it’s cause I said someone should shoot her. [I can’t imagine why someone would object to that!] Hak and I are cool though.
RWD: Well, wasn’t he the one that called the [REA] cops [aka the Gestapo] on you for that remark?
BG: No, he was not.
RWD: Despite their familial relationship? [Katie is Hak’s sister-in-law.]
BG: Hak doesn’t read the board. He’s not Jamie Russell.
RWD: A booster probably pays someone to read the board for Hak. Do you play hockey?
BG: Yes, you already know this. Instead of asking me, be like “Geist plays hockey,” then we can move on. [This isn’t my first rodeo, son.]
RWD: I am in charge here. What position do you usually play?
BG: Center or left wing.
RWD: And also puncher of chicks, right?
BG: Can’t take it, get the f*** off the ice.
RWD: That’s the UND way. So what if Aaron Marvin had hit Brad Malone in the same way [as Brad Malone hit Jesse Martin]? Do you think UND fans would call it a clean hit? [Um, duh, no.]
BG: No, because Aaron Marvin is a lowly piece of scum who has a reputation for dirty hits. Nothing he does is clean. He should be banned from hockey for life.
RWD: So it depends on the person delivering the hit. The exact same hit, mind you.
BG: If it happens against UND, it’s obviously a dirty hit. Anybody else, it’s clean.
RWD: Well, at least you can admit your faults. [Hypocrisy!]
BG: Don’t fault me for this. [I do.] I’m speaking on behalf of all Sioux fans.
RWD: I’m sure they are pleased. How many UND games a year do you attend?
BG: Dunno. [This is not a difficult question.]
RWD: I didn’t know you were innumerate.
BG: Fine, 8-10. [I am not sure this is accurate.]
RWD: Do you dress in full UND regalia? Like a nice jersey?
BG: No, it sucks. Dirty has reminded me of this numerous times.
RWD: What exactly is wrong with your jersey?
BG: Dirty says it sucks and Dirty is a jersey hooker [which is not the same thing as a Jersey hooker], so he obviously knows. [It has multiple mistakes.]
RWD: So you and Dirty went to games together in school?
BG: He sat with his friends, I sat with mine.
RWD: He had friends?
BG: Flanders until he jacked Dirty’s Playstation. [I had no follow-up questions.]
RWD: So you were not friends?
BG: We just sat with different people. Keep in mind he was like an 11-year senior.
RWD: So he was a creepy old dude.
BG: Still is. Not as creepy as Brent though.
RWD: Well, he doesn’t write checks, so no.
BG: Writing checks does not make Brent creepy, it makes him a moron.
RWD: Well, what makes Brent creepy?
BG: Have you ever seen him?
RWD: Ah, yes. So can UND possibly win this weekend without Brad Malone around to decapitate someone?
BG: I guess anything is possible but I’m going with unlikely.
RWD: So you think UND will get swept by tUMD?
BG: That’s what I’m calling, yes.
RWD: Hm. I haven’t seen sandbagging like this since…last spring in North Dakota!
BG: How am I sandbagging? UND is missing a lot of players this weekend, their goaltending is horrid. You tell me why UND has a chance against UMD.
RWD: Because UND typically stomps the shit out of UMD no matter how the teams are performing?
BG: So you’re sandbagging? [No, I’m a realist.]
RWD: We’ll see who is bagging sand. Who is the hottest player on the UND squad? Men’s, not women’s. [So he could not select Ms. Lamoureux or Ms. Lamoureux-Kolls.]
BG: Trupper. [Meh, he doesn’t do it for me.]
RWD: Interesting. Why is Brad Miller Time still called Brad Miller Time if its namesake is not involved?
BG: Because it’s legendary. [No.] It was on ESPNU. [No one watches that!] It’s a marketable brand. Yes, I am comparing BMT to Coca-Cola or Budweiser.
RWD: It’s certainly comparable to Budweiser in terms of quality. [Hi-yoooooo!]
BG: You don’t like it, why do you watch it?
RWD: I don’t watch it. But its existence offends me. I hear you are getting married soon.
BG: Yeah.
RWD: Any worries that you might have a wedding crasher from the ECAC?
BG: I think he’s getting invited.
RWD: Wow, you love to rub salt in a wound, don’t you?
BG: He’s mature, I’m mature [HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA], we’ll be fine.
RWD: I see. I’m planning to send a gift.
BG: I don’t want whatever you’re sending. [Jeez, I guess I’ll take back the Porsche then.]
RWD: Just some monogrammed towels to celebrate your wedding and name change. BS and TS.
BG: Oh I’m changing my name? Wow.
RWD: Dirty and I were unsurprised.
BG: Didn’t realize you and Dirty were that close.
RWD: Hey, what you don’t know could fill an ocean, Shamu.
BG: Says the woman who needs two seats at the X to fit her fat ass.
RWD: [Some stuff I had to take out.] F***, I’ll have to take that out. Who are your favorite UND players? Past and present?
BG: Parise and Oshie of the past [uh, wow, that’s not that far back], and currently I like Kristo [who is sucking hardcore under the pressure of being on Team Cougar] and Trupp [in that special tingly way].
RWD: How will UND win the games this weekend?
BG: By making sure every UMD player leaves on a stretcher. [See! Malone didn’t act alone!]
RWD: And how will they lose?
BG: By standard WCHA officiating. [Wahhhhh wahhhh!]
RWD: Score predictions?
BG: Friday – UMD 4, UND 2. Saturday – UMD 2, UND 0. [More like UND 6, UMD 1 and UND 8, UMD 0. Yikes.]
RWD: All right, I appreciate your participation. I’m giving you the Hakstol salute right now.
BG: Right back at you.
>North Dakotajugend
In case you were unaware, this year is the final year for the Fighting Sioux nickname and logo. It will be retired once the athletic season is over.
It might be a good time to get a new school song as well. Here is my suggestion, in honor of good ol’ Ralph:
*Please note, if you have not seen the movie Cabaret, you have to watch the whole thing in order to get the point.*
>Another BREC in the Wall
>
So, we made the drive up to Bemidji to see what we could see. And what do you think we saw? We saw the other side.
No, not really, I was getting us confused with the bear that went over the mountain. We saw a tie. And even though UMD got that power play goal late in the game, I knew that lead wouldn’t hold. Granted, it was hard to get things going. This is my first time seeing Bemidji State play live and they did not play a style I expected them to play. These guys stomped on the Bulldogs last year and this year were struggling to find offense. It took someone named Bilbo Baggins or something almost the entire game to find the net. Most of the game seemed to be focused around stopping the Bulldogs rather than beating them.
Bemidji’s goalie made some great saves including one on JT Brown in OT that I thought was a for sure game winner. Kenny did not make any brilliant saves that I noticed. Much of UMD’s puck luck this weekend came from Bemidji players being a day late and a dollar short on rebounds. I am not sure Bemidji players knew they could play in the slot or camp out in front of the net. tUMD’s defence played an outstanding game.
tUMD should have scored on the 5 on 3. Here’s the deal with that play: once tUMD got the delayed penalty, a Bemidji player made an even worse hit on another Bulldog as if daring the refs to make the call. They did. Yay.
Overall the BREC is nice but lacks atmosphere. The students do not have a leader. They do even fewer cheers than UMD fans. And their mascot is named Bucky but looks like an ethnic Goldy. Get it a leather tail or something. Most students were in costume and there were some really funny ones, like a Rubik’s Cube or Wooderson from Dazed and Confused.
Alcohol is for sale at the BREC. Unfortunately this led to some obnoxiousness. I’m sure it comes as no surprise that the biggest jerk of the night was a guy in a Sioux jersey who went down behind the Bulldog bench and started swearing at them and pounding on the glass, then tried to get by me to get out of the row. I told him to wait for a whistle and blocked his way. He took umbrage, swore at me, then climbed over a bunch of other seats and spent the rest of the time he was there swearing at me some more. Two students came up during the break between the 3rd period and overtime and screamed and swore at the UMD team and at Suz for almost the entire break before an usher came and led them, very slowly, away. I like to be a big jerk too but I am now sober while I do it. A Bemidji player grabbed JT Brown’s facemask and it popped open, and no call was made. So Phil Loadholt can’t do that to a Packer but Bemidji can get away with it? So I yelled “I know they haven’t won yet but you don’t have to give them the game.” I’m mean.
I still had a great time despite the outcome. And now I’m chillin’ in paradise at the Bjorneby homestead on Lake Bemidji.
Numbers
Wins until we reach last season’s total: 13! (Ugly wins count the same!)
Points until we reach last season’s total: 27! (Sweet!)
My Guys
Jack Connolly: 12!
JT Brown: 11
Brady Lamb: 4
Mike Seidel: 2
Drew Olson: 0
Freshmen
JT Brown: 11
Justin Faulk: 5!!! (Off notice!!! Tragically unable to see his goal as it was at the other end of the rink and they did not replay it!!!)
others: zeros
Connollys
Mikey: 13!
Jacky: 12!
Olsen/Olson
Dylan: 6
Drew: 0
Dan/Drew
Olson: 8
DeLisle: 2
On Notice
Wade Bergman
David Grun
Jake Hendrickson
Brady Lamb
Mike Montgomery
Max Tardy
Goals Only
Jack Connolly (WHAT??? JACKY, GET IT TOGETHER!!!)
Keegan Flaherty
Dylan Olsen
Mike Seidel
Runnin' With the Dogs 
