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>One If By Land, Two If By Sea

29 September 2009


The British Columbians are coming! The British Columbians are coming!

It’s that time of year when UMD plays a team of middle-aged men with wives, kids, and mortgages. Also known as Canadian college hockey players. Last year, when UMD played the Thunderwolves, there was a 30 year old on their roster. I am not even 30. Thankfully.

This year UMD will be playing the Thunderbirds on Saturday. Canadian universities are not very creative! I hope there is a university out there called the Thunderlizards. Can I get a what! what! from the brontosauri up in here? Maybe there is also one called the Thunderplatypi. A platypus would be a great mascot.

These “T-birds,” as they have dubbed themselves, are certainly elusive. Their website sucks. There is no information there. They did beat a team called the Ooks recently. I don’t even know how to respond to that. They are playing Calgary’s AHL affiliate on Wednesday, which I find odd. It sucks that we will get them when they are already demoralized. Josh Meyers will take care of that. They are also going to be playing the Gophers.

I don’t understand why these teams come play. I mean, they pretty much embarrass themselves every year. It’s weird that they don’t just go play Mercyhurst or Suckmidji.

I was hoping to find their roster, but no such luck. And there is a very strange sound coming from somewhere in my house. It sounds like a jackhammer. I have to go now.

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