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Nine Lives or: The Blog That Wouldn’t Die

14 September 2012

I dreamed a dream in time gone by…

Last night I had a dream that I was on the UMD men’s hockey team. Why the men’s team? I don’t know. Not important. Anyway, it appears my subconscious is modest and humble, because instead of giving me Jack Connolly-style moves, I had the same skating and stickhandling ability I have in real life. Which is the skill set of a below-average four year old. How the hockey team got to such a sad state that I would make it on a checking or energy line, I couldn’t say. Clearly that was not important.

Anyway, we (and here I can say “we” and actually mean it, because within the dream world I really was on the team, not just living vicariously through the players!) were playing UAH and really sucking and so the score was tied. I know it’s really hard at this point in the story to tell fiction from reality, but this is the dream we’re talking about. So I got really angry during the game (again, this is the dream, not reality, though it is hard to tell) and started slashing one of the UAH players. Repeatedly. In the face. While the ref was standing behind me watching. Something I would never, ever do. I am not an idiot. I would wait until the refs were not looking, then taunt the angry fans who clamored for a penalty. Oops, forgot, this was against UAH, they have no fans. Also, even though I was hacking away at this guy’s face (and he was NOT wearing a face shield), it didn’t actually hurt him, which was disappointing and probably didn’t help Dream Me’s frustration. Somehow I only ended up with a double minor (rather than expulsion from the team and criminal charges), but UAH scored on the PP and we lost 3-2 and it was all my fault, although no one blamed me because all my teammates liked me. (As a friend. It was not that kind of dream.)

I know this is really weird, but if it comes to you as a surprise that 1. I am weird and 2. I dream about hockey, then either welcome to my site, enjoy your inaugural visit, or sorry about the accident, I hope you get your memory back. The weather is cooling off, I’ve got my season tickets in my possession, and I’m dreaming about hockey. It’s about time for the season to start!

In typical me fashion, I have also been lazy and not posted, and I have failed to acknowledge my blog’s anniversary, yet again. This will be my ninth season, which means I’ve been at this crap for 8 years (but I got confused and thought this was my 9-year anniversary and came up with the title, which I liked and am now forcing to work.) Happy 8.033 year anniversary, everyone!

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