Bananarama

We have to talk about this, I suppose.

Oh who am I kidding OF COURSE WE HAVE TO TALK ABOUT THIS IT’S STILL AMAZING FIVE DAYS LATER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Naturally this past weekend had some, ahem, ups and downs. Ups like Biddy visiting and going on a hike with me, and also have dinner with Ben and my uncle who is now living in the woods like the Unabomber. I dressed up as Gene Simmons for Halloween again, so that was also good.

What’s not good is this whole splitting nonsense. I mean, I get that we may have gotten completely hosed in every way possible a little bit on a few Friday night games, but we’ve also been completely non-hosed in any conceivable manner for other games. It makes no sense. For example, in the Mankato State game, tUMD got jobbed in overtime by a dive that had several soccer coaches calling up the little punk who did it. That could have been avoided by not spotting Mankato a large lead and requiring overtime at all. Or getting jobbed last weekend by another such dive; it’s understanding Miami would be good at diving considering they have a world-renowned actor for a coach. They are masters of the Stanislavsky technique; I was impressed by their ability to stay in character the whole game. If tUMD had scored some goals, Miami’s Broadway-caliber embellishment wouldn’t have factored into the game.

LET’S TALK ABOUT THAT SAVE AGAIN. HOW CAN YOU LOSE A GAME WHERE A SAVE LIKE THAT IS MADE????????

I suppose the answer is you’re likely to lose most games where saves like that are required.

I guess the lesson here is score a metric ton (tonne?) of goals and then there’s not much the refs can do to take over the game. This is good advice, people. I am here to help.

These splits are such a problem because tUMD’s schedule is not going to let up anytime soon. Winnable games cannot slip through our fingers, or else tDogs find themselves in a position where difficult games are basically must-win games. For example, now tUMD is faced with trying to break its Friday slumps against St. Cloud IN that horrible city or, barring some kind of discontinuity in the universe that allows tUMD to win on a Friday night in Methville, MN, against UMTC in their stupid building. Nice position to be in. After that tUMD plays UNO and it’s Top Shelf To Food Shelf weekend and we know the goals will be pouring in to help charity.

How about a nice sweepity sweep in St. Cloud, men? The women have managed two in a row, you know.