Mea Culpa
I didn’t realize it had been over two weeks since I had posted here! I’m sorry, folks. There won’t be any of that anymore, because my tenure with the Northland News Center is over.
I don’t really know why, but I suspect it has to do with some of the things I’ve said on the blog. And no, not swear words, just things you’d never read from a sportswriter’s column. Things you all as readers are used to me saying, silly things like making fun of Troy Jutting for all his whining and complaining, or off-color jokes like when I said UMD took the Denver game by the throat, Chris Cook-style, but of course news outlets have to say things like “allegedly Chris Cook-style” and I don’t do that.
Ultimately, I suspect what it comes down to is, they sent a blogger to do a journalist’s job. Maybe I’m way off base and they just decided they weren’t going to have any blogs at all, or maybe they didn’t like that I used bad words on Twitter and my public “brand” as they say now was a little bit too controversial, or maybe they just didn’t go through the proper channels before they hired me and it was some technical glitch. I don’t know, I don’t really care, I was grateful for the opportunity and if it didn’t work out, it didn’t work out. I do feel badly for neglecting this blog because I’ve been so wrapped up in other things that I’ve only posted on there, because I was contractually obligated to do that. I was careful when I signed up to make sure there wouldn’t be any negative impacts to my site, and there weren’t, other than my own laziness.
So, I’ve probably made things harder for future bloggers hoping to jump into mainstream media, but oh well. That’s really never been my intention but I thought it would be a neat opportunity to make a little money without selling out my own blog with ads (which I’m still not going to do, even though there are some ads on here because WordPress makes me have them) and also to bring a little fun and humor to a wider audience of Bulldog fans. I don’t particularly have any ambitions of becoming a professional sportswriter, which is abundantly clear.
Thanks as always to the readers who followed me over there, and I apologize for the lack of content over here. I’ll have a lot more energy to cover the team in these coming months and so RWD should be chock full of the RWD you all know and love or hate with the fiery passion of a thousand suns.
Go for the sweep tonight, Bulldogs! It’s your last time to play in front of your home crowd until the lame ducks from Alabama-Huntsville chug into town.
Kidz Korner
Why, hello there, everyone!
My name is Bobo (no, of course that’s not my real name, but in this age of technology, a lad can never be too careful) and I am part of the vast network of RWD correspondents in all corners of the world. I was enlisted by RWD as an arena reporter for the UMD-Providence games. As I am two and a half years old and my parents don’t like when I use their computers without asking (What? Maybe they shouldn’t have so many enticing-looking buttons to push), it took me awhile to get this column ready. Fortunately, my parents are frequently distracted by this baby, Genie (again, not his real name, just his street name) who arrived at our house a couple weeks ago. He seems to be squatting in our house for the time being, and he’s provided perfect cover for me to get at the computers in our house to bang out a column. (Of course, banging on the keyboard has gotten me in a little bit of trouble, but my journalistic integrity is more important than avoiding a time-out. I’ll suffer the consequences while in pursuit of a hot story.)
Tragically, I was only able to attend the Saturday game. No one else was going to the game; I wanted to drive myself, but our car isn’t equipped for the vertically challenged (this might be a violation of the ADA Act, I’m looking into it with my attorney), and it is a really long ride on the MBTA commuter rail and I’d have like three transfers. I don’t have any money, but that isn’t a problem because I can just walk under the turnstiles.
Many of you are thinking, How could a two year old kid sit through a whole hockey game? Including overtime? Without Elmo? Well, first of all, people, I’m two AND A HALF, that fraction is very important, and I don’t appreciate being stereotyped. Elmo is for babies like Genie. I prefer more mature forms of entertainment, like Carz. I attended the game with my grandparents and my aunt, a Providence College alumna, so it was an adult outing. No babies allowed. I was attentive and engaged throughout regulation and overtime, THANK YOU VERY MUCH. By the way, Bruce, thanks for the shout out. It was wicked awesome.
Since this article is so late, I don’t believe a game recap is necessary. There were some ill-advised penalties, and some defensive lapses, but it’s tough to get two wins on the road. I want to request the UMD athletic department make sure to schedule games in New England in the future. (I also need a buy-in from my parents and grandparents, as they not only kept me from seeing the Friday game, but also prevented me from making it to Bridgeport in March. They forced me to go to Florida! Where I am barred from using the swimming pool at my great-grandparents’ complex, as if I am some incontinent boor!) I enjoy covering these games for RWD, and I assume in the future Bruce Ciskie might enlist me as a commentator. As long as he doesn’t mind if I refer to all players, coaches, and assorted personnel as “dingos.”
Signing off for now,
Bobo
Jekyll/Hyde
tUMD 6, Buttmidji 2
tUMD 1, Buttmidji 0
What an odd series this was.
So as you all know (duh), this series was my birthday series. Normally I post about it in advance to remind the boys I need a win, but I was lazy this week and didn’t. They remembered anyway. Such nice boys.
I wore my Dylan Olsen jersey for the first time since he abandoned ship, and was a little worried about the possible bad karma from it, but apparently it’s a lot luckier than I thought!
Although I didn’t think so at the beginning. What an unpleasant way to start the series: two Buttmidji goals 1:05 apart. I thought for sure this was going to be the same old same old, but Wade Bergman did not, and after a time out and a Series of Hilarious Events, he had scored. Really, just check out the AMSoil Arena channel on YouTube and watch the highlights from Friday, because I don’t even know how to describe the goal other than about 5 Bulldogs tried to put the puck in the net and missed, and about 5 Beavers tried to clear the puck and failed, and then Bergman was “Wade On The Spot” as Bruce Ciskie would say, and scored, just as I had finished sending an angry text message. JT Brown then scored, with an assist to Fidel Casto (who also had a goal! For us, rather than the other team!), and we were back to even before the period was over, which was awesome.
UMD pretty much took over the game from there on out, scoring 4 more unanswered goals while the Beavers managed to… improve Kenny Reiter’s save percentage, I guess. I was hoping for a couple more goals so UMD could outscore Tech (who beat DU 7-2), but since Tom didn’t pull his goalie with 7 minutes remaining, we had a little bit tougher time than Tech did.
So today the Buttmidji game plan worked a little bit better. Man, that game was brutal. In the first period, a Beaver fanned on a nearly empty net and that was the different for them, but the executed their “stop UMD from getting any offense going” strategy very well. UMD also mixed in a little sloppy play and I thought that was a recipe for disaster. A couple of guys hit pipes and there were some other close calls, but I really thought the game had potential to end 0-0, which was only underscored by a five minute power play with only a single shot on goal. The power play isn’t there yet. It’s still got a long way to go (although it’s miles ahead of the Wild’s.) FINALLY Jack Connolly had a pretty little goal that should be sent out to the Hobey voters as part of his highlights package. And the Dogs even managed to hang on with the extra attacker on for the Beavers, but I shudder to think what would have happened if they had pulled Bakala sooner.
But all is well, we’re not in the WCHA basement anymore, and we’ve swept those pesky Beavers and taken a little vengeance for the Final Five. (Well, the national championship was also vengeance.)
Finally, person in the Count von Count costume? You are awesome.
Quick Link
So, since the new blog doesn’t actually get linked from the Northland News Center sports page, I am resorting to linking it myself. Here ya go. Also, thanks to Kevin Pates for linking my stories there each week. I wonder if new anyone is actually reading those blogs. Probably not. New RWD post either tonight or tomorrow.
There Ain’t No Rest For The Wicked
Ok, yes, I didn’t write anything about those, ahem, “hockey” games we saw last week. Like about how there are a few Gopher players who should have stuck to football. Moped Boy and Iowa Boy can bite me.
Really, the best play of the weekend? This siiiiick goal from Mr. Caleb Herbert:
http://www.twitvid.com/embed.php?guid=OIQNL&autoplay=0
Paging Mr. Marshall: your jock strap can be found at guest services.
Anyway, not to worry, we’ll never see the Gophers at AMSoil Arena again unless they’re lost. I’m disappointed too, because they’ve showed their commitment to mediocrity by extending the Hedgehog’s contract.
So, Friday night. I arrive at the arena. I’m talking to Jupiter. Then Mrs. Ciskie interjected that Mike Curry was standing about 10 yards away.
Yes. MIKE CURRY.
Ok, first of all, no I am not his stalker lady, that was someone else. Second of all, we have never met, and he was one of my favorite Bulldogs, and I thought I’d never get the chance to just say hi. I mean, it’s not like it’s the end of the world, but still. So I went over and said hello. WHILE WEARING HIS GAME WORN JERSEY. BECAUSE I AM AN IDIOT. But, whatever, he was really nice, and I was really awkward, as you may expect. So, ok, checking that off my list. Whee!
Saturday we had our GPL-tPB skate at the arena. I lived, which was good. I’m still absolutely terrible at hockey with pretty much no hope of improvement. Certain message board proprietors might have been exceptionally hung over. Robby the Inchworm played again. We were teammates. He seemed disappointed in our lack of defence. As if we were paid professionals or something. Also I invited my friend Joe to play and he was about 1000 times better than almost everyone else, and on the opposing team. I need to align myself with the winning side next time. Or perhaps we lost because of me. I did pass the puck right to Heiz, who was on the other team, and scored. Also I assisted on a breakaway goal for DHG. The benefit of a slow line change on our team! And I had a collision with a member of the opposition who had the puck. I got completely rocked. So on my way back to the bench I said “Well did I at least take him out of the play?” And I did, so really it’s a win for me.
So Sunday we found the world still turning and fortunately Jack Connolly’s head is still attached to his body. I know I predicted he’d score 5 goals, but it’s really hard to score 5 goals when a guy is hooked, held, tackled, elbowed, and otherwise abused… and also when his linemate likes to shoot first and ask questions later. So, we’ll have to have the JCON 5 goal explodaganza another weekend. Like… against Providence?
I’ll have more on the Providence series later on.
Let The Babies Have Their Bottles
While the Gophers giggle over their little sweep of the national champions…
We’ll continue to BE the national champions.
The House Is Rockin’, Don’t Bother Knockin’
tUMD 4, Racist Mascots 3
No, we didn’t just jump into a collective DeLorean and travel back in time, we just happened to win in a very similar fashion.
Biddco and I started off the day at the Paul Allen show, live from the Buffalo Wild Wings on the campus of the southern branch of our university system. My enemy LaP was there and mentioned UMD raising a banner and I shouted “WOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!” very loudly. It was audible on the air. You should all be very proud of me.
We hit the road and rocked out to UMD-related songs such as “I’m On A Boat” and “Nothin’s Gonna Stop Us Now.” We hit the UMD stores, then the tailgate (which lacked food but had beer, which shows they have the same priorities as the fans), and then got into the arena nice and early for some chow and some warmups.
While the arena was not sold out (pathetic, come on), the crowd was incredibly jacked for the wonderful video of UMD history, roared when the team came out, and went insane for the banner. The team started out fired up, too, feeding off the energy of the crowd, and had a few good scoring chances early.
Something called Billy Maday scored to start the game off, but then Notre Dame decided to test UMD’s power play. Mike Seidel was like “idiots!” and scored. Notre Dame did really look like idiots as two of their players both went for the puck when it was in the air, allowing JT and Seidel all kinds of time to get the puck in the net unchecked. Hee!
Just a couple minutes later, Keegan Flaherty finally, finally, finally got the monkey off his back and put the puck in the net in a non-exhibition game. SO EXCITING. I flipped out, I was so happy for him. Let this be the beginning of something big.
Unfortunately, the cake-eater from Edina scored to tie it up, and we went into the intermission tied at deuces.
UMD scored again on the power play, a sick snipe from JT Brown, and then Notre Dame tied it up AGAIN at three. Was this going to be another year of overtime dramatics?
Late in the third period, Travis Oleksuk said no, it would not. He scored and the place went nuts. UMD hung on for the final minutes and through 53 seconds of the extra attacker. No one was kind enough to get an empty net goal to allow us to get Culver’s, although Jake Hendrickson tried his best.
So I am very tired, and about to go to sleep on a couch somewhere on Woodland Ave. In a house that has this in the basement:
Yes, that is a hockey stick wall. I love Duluth.
The Big News
Ok, so it’s not really that big, but Sunday I hinted that I would have some “VERY EXCITED RWD-RELATED NEWS!!!” Let’s ignore the grammatical faux pas there and focus.
This season I’m writing for the Northland News Center as… I don’t really know, some sort of adjunct voice from the fanbase. I feel very fancy and excited about this, and I hope you’ll click over and see. It’s not really any different from RWD stylistically, but it is going to be different content. I’ll be writing one article per week.
This doesn’t mean anything as far as RWD is concerned. The more fun stuff like Adventures in Photoshop and my features like The Gauntlet, etc. will still be over here. I think it’s kind of neat and exciting and it was an honor to be approached about the partnership.
Right now everything is in the beginning stages and I think in the future it will look different (it will include a picture of me [terrifying] and a short bio) and I HOPE that it will be linked somewhere on the sports page because right now it’s a secret. But please clickety click on over there and see what the fuss is all about.
See you all in less than two days to raise that beautiful banner!!!
And Away We Go!
tUMD 5, Ontario Penal League B-Team 1
Well, we won, which is more than our 2011 national championship game opponent can say!
Perhaps you noticed it was a little quiet in the rink last night. I didn’t go to the game (nor did DHG) so there wasn’t anyone to shout at people. Instead I had a little soiree with family and friends and watched the national championship game again followed by the exhibition game. Incidentally, my dad and my brother had never seen the part where Grun yells “Schmitty, you f***er!” and they both burst out laughing. I’m sure Kyle’s Norwegian team will be saying that a lot this year.
Look who made the front page of the Thunder Bay Chronicle-Journal:
Thanks so much to my friend Lucas for the photo! One day in Canada I hope they will have the technology to put their newspapers on the interwebs. Also, this image is giant. Sorry but I am too lazy to re-size it.
So the game started out with a Jack Connolly!!!! goal, just the way it should be. Somehow Lakehead managed to get a puck past Kenny while My Jacky was getting out of the penalty box. IMPOSSIBLE that he would ever take a penalty. IDIOT referees. One Joe Basaraba, budding superstar, got a goal near the end of the period.
In the second period, Travis Oleksuk decided he couldn’t let some OTHER kid from Ontario steal the show, and scored a power play goal (assisted by My Jacky and Scott Kishel), followed by another one in the beginning of the third period. Adam Krause finished off the scoring with a very strange whiff/goal.
I can’t really tell what happened because I wasn’t there, but these freshmen are… not to be underestimated. Chris “Fidel” Casto is quite a beast. Derik Johnson seemed right at home; as Bruce says “We didn’t say his name a lot, which is a good thing.” Sounds like his dad will be on hand for the season opener. I also heard complimentary things about Crandall, Jr. Our freshmen may not be as flashy as some other teams’ players, but they are solid, hard-working kids who already know what Bulldog Pride means.
My friend Chad did a little blogger poll this year. You can find the results on his site. I can’t remember how I voted, but I voted UMD to win the league, I had the same All-WCHA team except I voted for Steven Seigo from MTU instead of Ben Blood. I voted Zucker for player of the year, Rocco “Misogynist” Grimaldi for rookie of the year, Justin Schultz for defenceman of the year, and Mike Seidel for breakout player of the year. The pollsters voted UMD 5th (WRONG), Jack Connolly for the All-WCHA team (CORRECT), and JT Brown tied for break-out player of the year, which is confusing since he kicked so much butt as a freshman already, but maybe he will get 100 points or something.
Well, the season is afoot, the Dogs have a win (unofficially), and in the next few days I will have some VERY EXCITED RWD-RELATED NEWS.
On the Pulse of the Season
http://wild.nhl.tv/team/embed.jsp?catid=842&id=39120 (Ok, hm, that didn’t work. Meh.)
Yes, yes, I’m still blogging. I hope you’ve found your way over here from the old site.
So, we are the defending national champions. Next week UMD will be showing off their very first banner against one of the opponents we slaughtered along the way: Notre Dame. I’m very excited.
No Mike Connolly, no Justin Fontaine. No Mike Montgomery, no Kyle Schmidt, no Trent Palm, no Chad Huttel. Justin Faulk will likely make the NHL with the Carolina Hurricanes.
Who cares? We’ll repeat our national championship just the same. Starting with the Overage Terrible Canadians from Thunder Bay, all the way up to whatever ragged band of sad sacks we meet in the title game in Florida. Wooo!
Runnin' With the Dogs 
